Sunday, December 13, 2009

It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life

Can I just tell you that I breathed a huge sigh of relief this morning to start a new week?

We had a hard week, y'all.

Sometimes that happens.

I have a lot of updates to share, and I'm going to move quickly, so hold onto your hats.  Some good news and some bad news.  Let's just go in chronological order:

Friday Dec 4, morningUltrasound at my OB.  The baby's head had measured large on an earlier scan, so just double checking, to rule out hydrocephalus.  The way my mind works, I'm all but shopping for pediatric wheelchairs at just the mention of the thing.  But it was healthy for me to think through.  "So what if the baby has special needs?  That's not the end of the world.  We will still love him or her.  God is still God, and we'll see how He glorifies Himself in this adventure."

But don't call the neurosurgeon for us just yet.  The head is normal.  The whole baby is huge, but that's fine.'s a boy.

We had planned to wait and be surprised at delivery.  Made it through the first big ultrasound when you usually find out the gender by hiding our eyes.  But the doctor just blurts it out this time, for no apparent reason.  (Not my usual doctor!)  I have no idea why.  He didn't seem too broken up about it either.

Whatever.  It's not like the birth will be boring, even without that surprise.

So exciting!  Yea.  A boy.  That will be fun.

A healthy baby boy.

He will (almost certainly) be named Henry Wisdom, and go by H.W.

that afternoon:  My grandfather died.

My sweet 93 year old grandfather, my mom's dad, died instantly and painlessly at his beloved farm.  On the farm where he was born.  Exactly how he had hoped to die, and what we all wanted for him.  

My mom found him.  I can't imagine her sense of dread, driving out to his farm when she realized he was home late and not answering his phone.  In a tremendous grace of God, he appeared peaceful and comfortable.  I pray that God grants my mom a peaceful remembrance of the event as well.

When I told the kids, Jonas thought for a moment and then said, "He'll be so excited when he wakes up and he's in heaven."

Saturday Dec. 5, afternoon:  Make the decision to take the kids to Oklahoma for the funeral without Justin.  Justin could go Sunday and come back Monday, but I dread making the drive two days in a row and would like to stay longer.  So I need to go without him.  Laundry and packing.

that night:  Betty develops a fever.  Never mind about going to the funeral.

Sunday Dec. 6: Stay home with sick Betty. 

Monday Dec. 7: Sad to be missing funeral.

Abdominal pain and contractions.  Maybe a touch of Betty's virus???

I've had Braxton Hicks, but these feel a bit firmer... and there are more of them...

OK, I think I need to go to the doctor.  Need someone to keep the kids, but can't ask any of my mommy friends because Betty is sick and I don't want their kids to get sick.  Can't call my mom, she is at her father's funeral.  Justin is in College Station; he carpooled with friends and is trying to get here ASAP but it may be awhile.   Justin's mom will be here as soon as she can, but her boss just had a baby two days before so she really can't leave work very early.   I call Justin's grandparents; his grandmother stays with the kids and G-Dad drives me to the doctor.

Admitted to labor & delivery for monitoring.  Very dehydrated.  Very uncomfortable G-Dad, whom I doubt has ever before been inside the labor & delivery unit.

After 2 liters of IV fluids, I feel better and the contractions stop.  Sent home late that night.

Tuesday Dec. 8: Bedrest all day.  Justin with the kids; Betty still has fever.

Huge thanks to Stephanie, Mamaw, and Mandi for bringing dinner all week.

Wednesday Dec. 9: Feeling a little better.  Out of bed some.  Betty's fever is gone.

Thursday Dec. 10: Wake up with red painful right eye.  Feels like someone is poking me in the eye with a stick.  Very sensitive to light; have to drive with sunglasses over my regular glasses (note to self: pick up some prescription sunglasses!) and a scarf around my head Jackie O. style to block out more light.  Except it's Jonas' scarf that I dig out of the backseat, and it doesn't wrap around my head elegantly but rather just drapes across my face, dangling to the chin on either side.

Go to OB for follow-up, am pronounced good as new, except for the eye thing.  Go to ophthalmologist who diagnoses infection from contact lens, prescribes drops.  Relieved it's not pink eye and not contagious.  Home to bed; worn out from driving around all day with a tree branch in my eye.

Friday Dec. 11:  Wake up with a fever.  Are you kidding me???

Consider it the most joyous of good news when the doctor says I don't have to come be seen in clinic.  For the third time this week.

Another day in bed.  Feel lousy all day.  Eye feels better though.

Saturday Dec. 12: Thankfully my fever is gone.  Take the kids out for donuts.  In case you're counting, that's 4 days this week they've been away from me:  two days I'm literally gone most of the day, two other days of bedrest.  Not used to that.  Starting to miss the little guys; the stress is affecting them too.

That night they stayed with Mamaw and we had a fun evening with some friends.  I was glad to get out and officially pronounce the week OVER.


I know God taught me something.  Probably about self-reliance and pride.  Turns out, I really can't do it all.  I actually do need my family, and my friends, and my church.  And it doesn't kill me to ask for help. Bless my sweet husband; he took such good care of me.  He completely turned his schedule upside down this week, and I know it's going to cost him. 

And we're having a boy!  It's starting to seem real now.  7 weeks to go...

I haven't done much of the Advent activities I had scheduled for this week.  But I have been turned toward God, forced to acknowledge my dependence and frailty.  I await His coming....

"...the oil of gladness instead of mourning,
 the garment of praise instead of a faint spirit..."
Isaiah 61:3


Cheryl said...

wow girl...glad you survived the week! And glad it's over. I hope this week is better for you!

mandi said...

oh- i just love reading/hearing your thoughts. what huge lessons motherhood teaches us.

i have to admit, as much as i feel for you, picturing you with jonas' scarf around your head made me giggle just a little.

5 Chicks and a Farmer said...

oh my friend!!! what a whirlwind! so true...lots of good and bad. let us know if we can do anything at all for you guys! Praying for sweet H.W. to stay put a little while longer.

Traci said...

Weelllllllll, atleast Dec. 3rd was kinda fun. ;-)

I got chills reading Jonas's thoughts when his grandpa wakes up in heaven....

I love what you have learned...anytime you increase your family size, you are handing yourself over more to God to handle you (well and the fact that you only have two hands and one brain creates the opportunity for dependence on Him in a real tangible way). The very act of motherhood is a step in faith and humbleness. Right? Hugs to you all.

Thank you for sharing your life.

Tamasin Blake said...

I really enjoyed reading this blog, thank you for finding the time to post!